In the absence of a blog post, here’s my spam

by | Mar 31, 2012 | Uncalled-for solipsism

I get a lot of 419 spam-hawking people emailing my various accounts, and in the absence of three blog posts I can’t seem to get right (one about Network Rail, a second about the ICO which I really want to make worthy of the title ‘How to Succeed in Backlogs Without Really Trying’, and a third about David Cameron & FOI), I thought I would share this one. In terms of sheer detail and immediacy, I think it’s unsurpassable. If you get better ones, tweet me.

McCARRAN INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT
Las Vegas, Nevada
Airport Shuttle Keeper

Good Day,

Sorry for the delay in this message, On Friday we were checking over some files and packages in the office and we discover an ATM CARD which was addressed to your name, Home address and email (I think it is a winning funds) I believe you can remember a dealing that has to do with some cooperate body or individual about this said funds to be delivered to you through an (ATM CARD) but I do not have idea why it was on hold at our Airport up-to-date.

So we contacted the Authorities and they asked us to get in contact with Senator David Mark, to get an approval to figure out what was in the package, After checking over the ATM CARD, we discovered a total sum of $10,000,000.00 ($10 Million USD) through the router figurative machine who check on balance through the number on the ATM CARD, so we reported back to the Senator David Mark and we were asked to deliver the package to you from this office. (Senator David Mark, Senate President of Federal Republic of Nigeria)

We need you to reconfirm your full name and  Home address if shown as it is on the package we have here.

If you want it to be delivered to you immediately, it will cost you just $225 which is the charges for the insurance certificate and delivery of the ATM CARD meanwhile your funds is safe with our securities service so please have that in mind.

Below is the payment information, payment should be made via money gram or western union and also send us your address as well for the delivery so that it won’t be delivered to the wrong address and someone else will receive a miracle he or she never worked so hard for to get.

NAME: DANIEL OKAH
CITY:  GARKI
STATE:  ABUJA
COUNTRY:  NIGERIA
Amount:  $225

The information above is where the ATM CARD was stopped at McCARRAN INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT in Las Vegas, Nevada.

THIS MAIL IS NOT A SPAM OR SCAM MESSAGE, WE CAN DELIVER YOUR FUNDS TOMORROW IF WE RECEIVED REPLY FROM YOU, I HAVE INCLUDED MY NAME AND MY SSN FOR YOU TO KNOW I AM FOR REAL AND NOT A SCAM IF YOU NEED TO VERIFY ME, SO STOP DEALING WITH ANY BODY IF YOU HAVE SOME SCAMMERS YOU ARE DEALING WITH AND FOCUS ON GETTING YOUR FUNDS HERE IN THE STATES, YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED NOT TO DISCLOSE THIS DEAL TO NO ONE OR ELSE TERMINATION FROM THE HOUSE OF SENATE WILL PENETRATE ON YOUR FUNDS DUE TO THE FACT THAT YOU WERE TRYING TO CONTACT ANOTHER PERSON TO FIND OUT WHAT THIS IS, SO NO MISTAKE OF SUCH WILL BE TOLERATED.

CHARLES SWIDER
Supervisor Manager
MY SSN NUMBER: 016-38-1497
Email: officeoffice272@inteligweb.com.br
For:  Airport Shuttle Keeper